


god does not hear your pleas.

by tukiaa



Category: Devilman (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Normal High School, Angst, Angst and Tragedy, Canon: Devilman Crybaby, Devilman Crybaby References, Fudo Akira Is A Crybaby, Hurt No Comfort, Hurt/mild comfort, M/M, Mild Language, i havent seen the 1972 devilman anime yet, now that i think about it its more, sorry aaaa, this is supposed to be a oneshot but it's longer than expected lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-26
Updated: 2020-06-26
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:20:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,523
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24724447
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tukiaa/pseuds/tukiaa
Summary: ➸ That was Asuka Ryo. Asuka Ryo rose above all of his classmates. Asuka Ryo was detail-oriented. Asuka Ryo planned ahead. Asuka Ryo this, Asuka Ryo that."Asuka Ryo, you dumbass!"Asuka Ryo was a dumbass.
Relationships: Asuka Ryo | Satan/Fudo Akira
Comments: 4
Kudos: 50





	1. the end of the world.

**Author's Note:**

  * For [t00ru](https://archiveofourown.org/users/t00ru/gifts).



> ➸ this should go without saying, but in this story akira will be who he was for most of the DMCB series ^^  
> ➸ thank u 2 @t00ru for helping me w/ the ending !!

Asuka Ryo was never one to believe in God.

In all honesty, who would? A man in the sky, a book without a definite author, a group of people who believe without evidence. Hole after hole in each and every aspect of Christianity, it made his head hurt. To follow blindly in the absence of proof was something that he could never dream of doing, for Asuka's body belonged to information.

Every part of him did, in fact. Ever since he was a child, Asuka Ryo gorged on details and instruction and raw information. It was simply a bottomless hunger, something that simmered sourly in the back of his throat and wouldn't go away. Foolishly, he kept feeding with the idea that it might leave him — even if it were only for a moment. Feeding a monster which knew no boundaries and whose appetite knew no discrimination. Foolishly, foolishly he fed and foolishly it asked. Higher and higher it raised him as his burdens ran deeper, to which Asuka realized the value in ability. _But_ , _no matter!_ He thought to himself, and casted aside every cumbrance that befell him. Intelligence gave you power, and power gave you wealth and status. In the end, in the grand scheme of the life he had planned for himself, it was simply a small price to pay to have to shoulder the weight of something with so much potential. 

That was Asuka Ryo. Asuka Ryo was detail-oriented. Asuka Ryo planned ahead. Asuka Ryo this, Asuka Ryo that.

"Asuka Ryo, you dumbass!"

Asuka Ryo was a dumbass, apparently.

He felt an arm loop itself around his shoulders, and came face to face with a familiar boy.

"I called you, like, 50 times asking if you wanted me to stop by your house so we could catch the bus together, but you never answered!" Fudo dug out his phone from his pocket and shoved it in Asuka's face. On the screen, it read that he had ignored his calls 4 times.

"Sorry, my phone was on silent."

"Whatever, at least I caught you now." A smile edges the sentence.

Fudo Akira. A third year in Nakado Academy. 18 years old, 181 centimeters tall. He likes to be active, and comes to school either on time (8:35 A.M.) or a few minutes late (the latest being 8:50 A.M.). 

Of course, Fudo had a place in Asuka's future as well. He had a role, as everyone else did. Yes, Asuka had thought it over so many times it now ran smoothly in his head as he thought about it. Especially now, with the boy's ragged, uneven breath brushing against his left cheek as they walked together to school. Fudo had taken time in fixing his hair today, which Asuka noticed almost immediately. His jawline ran sharper than usual and his eyes pierced deeper than before. For the first time in a couple of days, a stripe of anticipation ran up Asuka's spine, chilling him in spite of the warm weather. He tightened his fist even more as it snuggled underneath his pocket, wrapping around an envelope.

Right, he thought to himself. They walked to class this morning, and they'd continue to walk alongside each other for the many mornings to come.

"Are you excited, Ryo? Man, it's almost like the world is ending."

"Excited? The world ending?"

"Did you forget? Today is our last day of high school."


	2. a bee and a flower.

The bell rang its perpetual chime of the start of the day and just like that, Asuka's final day of high school had officially begun. The teachers had been exhausted of any and all material, and were overcome with pity for their students and excitement for their departure as they assigned little to no classwork. Despite the end that awaited his classmates when the final bell sings its lament (or would it be a celebratory tune?), the day continued as if it were like any other. Like a sheep who wandered aimlessly in search of a purpose in its herd, Asuka followed. Normally, he'd do most of the work assigned to them and hand his papers over to Fudo, who sat right next to him. He copied it all off, and they'd both have the rest of the class period to themselves. No one really bothered them, which was something he'd picked up on a while ago. It was as if there was some sort of thin, invisible membrane that formed a bubble around the pair. Not a single classmate went up to them until one of the two got up and walked away. 

This aspect of the day, unfortunately, strayed from its path.

"So, Asuka, what are your plans for when you leave school?" Kuroda Miki popped up from behind Fudo, a curious and amused look playing on her face. Fudo had been hard at work copying all of Asuka's math answers, but tore himself away like a goldfish at the mention of his best friend. Asuka wondered where he got such a short attention span.

"Well, I-"

"Ryo says he's planning on going to school in Tokyo!" Fudo's voice cut through their conversation, eyes brightened at something he could boast about.

"Tokyo?" Kuroda said, a thoughtful look on her face. "That's so ambitious!"

"Mm," Asuka hummed in confirmation. 

"What do you expect from none other than Ryo? He's the smartest person I know!"

"Yeah, Asuka is really intelligent," Kuroda added onto Fudo's praises. "If I remember correctly, he even scored top of the school for all three years. Wah, I'm so jealous of you, Asuka. You're so cool and admirable," she gave a slight cry and sighed in what could only be described as envy.

"It's nothing. I'm simply doing what is asked of me." Praises were never something that directly fed Asuka. He knew he was right, he knew he was doing a good job, he didn't need someone to tell him. Silence was the best approval for him. The silence of others made him feel so powerful, it was quite an antagonistic trait but he wouldn't have it any other way. However, the blatant way Fudo's eyes glossed over and his ears perked up when his friend is mentioned just so he could brag about him is another thing that he didn't mind. Fudo played a very special role in Asuka's life. He had only said it once, in the night of February of last year (when his friend was half asleep, mind you), but Asuka believed Fudo's only place was next to him. A mutualistic relationship, if you will.

Kuroda and Fudo began to converse some more, their eye contact never breaking as they dove deeper and deeper into who knows what. Asuka's stare narrowed a little, his mind fogging but eventually clearing as he forced himself to look away. The windows were opened by Fudo in the classroom, a light breeze welcoming itself. Outside lay the rest of the school grounds, and a small flower bed planted and maintained by the first years.

A bee. A bee and a flower. 

Asuka watched absentmindedly, a first for him, in the societal gloom of the last day of school. There were a clump of daisies in the bed. Argyranthemum daisies, if he recalled correctly. There they sat, upright and emotionless, watching a bee make its way down to them. It landed on just one, paying it its mind and time of day as it extracted its food for the hour or week or however often bees ate, shaking off its pollen for the daisy to reproduce. 

Mutualism. 

The bee flew away, tearing itself from the flower without a second thought. The daisy still sat, upright and emotionless. Its nectar had been stripped and on its petals lay the pollen. It watched the bee float into oblivion, in the reciprocal understanding that they would forget and die without ever recollecting the time on a March 25th morning that a bee fed on its nectar and a daisy took away its burdensome yellow dust. 

Give, take, give, take. What a simple concept that dumbed down the world. 

"Fudo, are you seriously crying so early in the morning?"

"I'm sorry! It's just — Miki's crying so much right now."

"No, I'm not!"

Asuka thought it was inane.


	3. goodbye youth.

The Japanese honey bee which took without understanding, and the Argyranthemum daisy which allowed without contending.

The bell rang for the final time.

Now that Asuka thought it over, in the little windows of time where Fudo wasn't speaking to him and his classmates weren't badgering him, the final bell's tune had somewhat of a distressing hint to it. Almost as if it were tearing up for the students which were leaving the school to continue life. 

"Man, that bell has never sounded better." Fudo was always attached to Asuka's hip. When they went to school, when they left school, when they left the classroom. Many had commented on their drastic difference in appearance. Fudo with his tan skin, muscular build, and dark hair, and Asuka with his pale skin, fragile body, and blond hair. Night and day, they described them. The quintessentials of a binary. Fudo thought it was cool, but Asuka never thought much about it. He didn't care what his friend looked like, as long as he was where he always was. 

The envelope bore a certain hole through his pocket now.

"Akira."

"Yeah?"

"Would you like to come over today? I heard it's a full moon tonight, and we have a good view from my apartment. It'd be a nice way to end the day."

"About that..." Fudo trailed off, his eyes refusing to look at Asuka. "I got invited by Miko for a graduation party at Kukun's place."

"You can't cancel?" Kuroda. Why was everything about her so much lately? His mind which caressed itself in tranquility muddled up again as he stopped and turned to face his friend. "Full moons occur every 29 or so days. Your high school graduation occurs once in your life. A silly party with the same welcomings of alcohol and terrible music will cross you too many times to count. Is there not a better way to say goodbye to your youth?"

Despite his adamance on maintaining eye contact, Asuka couldn't see much of Fudo's eyes at all. He couldn't see much of anything. He simply felt that warmth in his throat and the ever present petiteness of his body. One, two seconds. Three, four. Time and breath halted for just a moment of five seconds.

"Wow, Ryo. I didn't know you could be so passionate about these types of things. I didn't think they interested you," he swiped at his eyes and kept walking. "When you put it that way, it'd be kinda hard to turn down my best friend, huh?"

"Right."

_"I didn't know you could be so passionate about these types of things. I didn't think they interested you."_

He was right. They didn't. 


	4. yet, foolishly.

The bee which flew to make and harvest the fruits of its labor retreated into the humid air of March.

He who forgot as the moon heaved itself up.

Asuka walked back home as the only witness, his mind harboring with the same encumbrance the damp weather bestowed upon his delicate skin. 

･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ.

The Big Dipper Constellation that consisted of seven stars from the constellation Ursa Major. The night pollution levels that obscured one's view of the bright little things in the sky. Asuka saw none of that tonight. Instead, he saw the stars which peppered the deep dark sky, and he saw Fudo Akira. 

"Whoa, there really is a full moon!"

The grass tickled his face as he laid on the ground, head supported by Fudo's schoolbag as he felt the boy's own head resting on his stomach. He should be worried about his hair getting messy, or going over what he should bring with him in his already packed suitcase, but — oddly enough — none of it mattered. Asuka had always kept a mental list of things that had to be done from when the day began to when it ended. He had six things on that list, now he had none.

"I see the rabbit is still there."

"Yeah, I kept telling you as a kid, we had to go rescue it from all the way up there. It must have been so lonely, on the moon all alone."

"And I kept telling you it was just large, dark plains that made those markings."

"Whatever."

The hare that shimmered under the glare of the stars, and his concerns which danced with it. Asuka allowed his mind to worry itself with just one thing as his stomach bloomed in warmth. It had actually been harrying him for months, but only made itself present now. He reached into his pocket, fingers sliding around the small white envelope that sat quietly. 

"Akira."

"Hm?"

"You understand I'm leaving for Tokyo, right?"

"Yeah."

"I'm going to college there, and I'm planning on pursuing a job as a scientist and university professor."

"I know, you told me this. What about it?"

Asuka Ryo was never one to beat about the bush. So why was he now? Stop stalling, he told himself. Stop trying to drag your feet.

"So," he straightened up, setting his back rigid and Fudo's head into his lap, "come live with me."

One, two seconds.

"...What?"

"Come live with me." Asuka finally pulled out the thin little wrapped parcel and slid it under Fudo's hands. The heat and weight that struck his pocket left with the envelope, and a new warmth traveled to his throat in its stead. "In that envelope you'll find a train ticket for tomorrow, and the apartment I rented there is large enough for the both of us."

"Tomorrow?"

"Yes." Focus. Don't falter. 

" _Tomorrow_? That's so soon, Ryo."

"Surely not soon enough for you." Don't falter, don't falter. Repetition proved more futile with each word, he knew that. 

Yet, foolishly, he kept repeating.

"I told you, Akira," Asuka put his hand over Fudo's, "we're close. We can only trust each other. That in and of itself cannot be severed by me moving. It's simple: just come with me. I have everything set up and-"

"Ryo." Asuka couldn't see his face. Fudo was never one to put up a wall. He was always so transparent with everyone, his friend worried sometimes. He always looked people in the eyes, he always cried without warning. But, his face was nowhere to be seen now. His head simply hung low, gaze seemingly fixated on the envelope in front of him. "I can't just leave. I have family here-"

"They're not your family."

"You know what I mean!" He snapped his head up.

Don't falter.

"My point is, Ryo, I can't just leave. The Makimuras are waiting for me back home. Miki is waiting for me-"

"Just what is so special about Makimura that you won't come with your childhood friend to continue your lives toge-"

"Ryo, I can't come with you!"

Asuka had heard Fudo shout before, that should go without saying. But, this one was different. Could it have been that it had been a while since he'd raised his voice, maybe he heightened it a bit too much? Did Asuka eat something strange? Whatever it was, it made his chest hurt. 

"Listen, Ryo, it's not like we'll never see each other again. I wasn't so worked up about this because I just assumed I could call and then come visit you. I just can't leave everything behind, you know?"

Words garbled and that acidic substance in the back of his throat simmered even more. Asuka's plan was to move to Tokyo with Fudo, become a professor, and live as he had predicted, because his plans never failed. Why was it not working now?

"Ryo?"

Asuka Ryo planned ahead. Asuka Ryo never withered.

They don't know you like I do, he could say. You can only trust me, he should tell him. But he knew Fudo. He knew raw individual dependency was too much to ask of him. He knew that his weakness was in his family, so how did he come to this in the first place? 

Hope was useless. Asuka knew that better than anyone. Of course he knew. He knew everything.

"Hey, it's getting late. I should get going-"

"Stay."

Hope was something meaningless that asked to be fed, and would only delude you more. At the root of every tragedy, there was hope. 

"Ryo..."

"Akira, stay." His eyes ran dry. A breeze hit his face as he looked up at Fudo, who had stood up with his bag slung over his shoulder. 

Asuka Ryo never cried. There was never a need to. True sorrow did not exist. Those films and those books and those videos which declared something as absurd as love as the cause of all sorrow were nothing more than pieces of fiction. He always skipped over those bits, writing them off as nothing but a fallacy. Love didn't exist. There was no such thing as love. Therefore, there was no sorrow. 

Something warm dropped on his cheek. Was he crying? No, he wasn't. His waterline was destitute, as always. So whose tears were these? 

Hope was a thread that led to failure. 

Akira dropped his bag and knelt down, tears running from his glossed over stare. He always cried, which should be obvious within a few seconds of knowing him. But, the both of them were shocked by the other. The incredulity which struck Akira's features, and the surprise which stabbed through Asuka's chest. 

A thread which was made of a single fiber and brought along a path of nothing. 

Yet, foolishly, he kept tugging.

･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ.

A kiss. An action commonly seen throughout various media and in life itself. A touching of the lips which was perceived in society to be a sign of love or sexual desire. Asuka did not believe in love, ergo he did not believe in kisses. There was no meaning behind it, and if there were it all tied back to that fake thing called hope. That was not an opinion, that was fact and he understood it very well.

In spite of that, he still responded. Akira had never had his first kiss, and neither had Ryo. With that being the case, there was nothing to compare or contrast. 

Sloppy, rushed, dripping with zeal. The tears which did not belong to him stained his face as they fell from his friend. He should have been startled, he should have been pushing him away. But he couldn't. 

Ryo's sighs and impatience and impatient sighs matched Akira's under the watchful eye of the moon. The warmth in his throat proved hotter and it became harder to breathe as he lent to the boy in front of him all of his air. There could have been tongue, there could have not been. Akira could have said his name and Ryo could have said his. In a life of definition and guarantees, the moment was full of "what-ifs" or "what-could-have-beens." Ryo wanted his friend by his side, he wanted him to come with him on the train that set off the next day. But perhaps this was enough.

The Japanese honey bee and the Argyranthemum daisy that held each other that morning. How plausible could it have been that neither one forgot? Was there a chance that, in the years to come, they would remember the morning of March 25th of this year? 

Akira pulled away, his weeping growing heavier as he took a final look at Ryo. Grabbing his bag, standing up, and giving his fragile-bodied friend one last embrace. Push him away, he could have done. Reason with him until he caves, he told himself. Nonetheless, Ryo dug his chin into his shoulder, the shirt beneath him dampening and his voice completely quiet.

"You're crying, Ryo. I've never seen you cry."

The bee and the daisy, both of whom mourn for each other under the same moon.

"It's getting late." 

The hare which illuminated the world from above, staring in pity.

"I have to go, Ryo. I'll see you later."

Fudo Akira never cried for himself. Rather, he saw the pain in others and grieved for them. Washed with the heartache he shared between them, he'd try all he could to provide them with solace.

His footsteps weighed on the grass, getting louder the farther they became from Ryo. His tears still trickled down, never ceasing even as he grew to be far, far away from his friend. 

Ryo stared, his head forcing itself to look up in the space that was between Akira and the sky so there was a clear view of both. His tears mixed in with the wind, being blown off as quickly as they pooled again at his eyes. His hands shook and his whimpers rattled the cry of a thousand miseries. 

Asuka Ryo was never one to believe in God.

Yet, foolishly, he asked Him on this lonely night what he did to deserve this. 


End file.
